Archives for the 'Flash' Category
EP Flash: Nightshift in the Automart
Published on 16 Jan 2007 at 11:42 pm.
14 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated R.
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-->By Andrew Gudgel.
Read by Jared Axelrod (of The Voice of Free Planet X).
The doors whooshed open and the Goddess Kali strode up to the counter. She stopped in front of him, grinning wickedly. Straight platinum-blonde hair spilled down over her shoulders and high bare breasts, contrasting with her inky black skin. Jeremy noticed a necklace of tiny, perfectly-formed ceramic skulls hung around her neck.
“Hi, Jeremy.”
“‘Lo, Suzy.”
The Goddess Kali’s eyes flashed red with anger. “Don’t call me that!” Behind her, a whole pantheon wandered the aisles, looking for late-night snacks.
Rated R. Contains partial nudity, some language, petty crime, and a few gods’ names taken in vain.
EP Flash: Printcrime
Published on 9 Jan 2007 at 12:55 pm.
18 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated PG.
By Cory Doctorow.
Read by Karen Roman.
Da. What they did to him. When he was done, he looked like he’d been brawling with an entire rugby side. They brought him out the door and let the newsies get a good look at him as they tossed him in the car. All the while a spokesman told the world that my Da’s organized-crime bootlegging operation had been responsible for at least 20 million in contraband, and that my Da, the desperate villain, had resisted arrest.
Rated PG. Contains moderate violence and very slippery slopes.
EP Flash: Act of Devil
Published on 31 Oct 2006 at 2:30 am.
22 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated R.
By Paul S. Jenkins. (of The Rev Up Review).
Read by Mur Lafferty (of Geek Fu Action Grip).
There was a group of them at college who were into Satanism. My mom, Betty Bloxham as she was then, was one of them. It all sounds a bit kinky, going into the woods at dead of night and dancing in the nude under the full moon.
Anyway, they were all high on drugs at the time, so I doubt they knew what they were doing.
Rated R. Contains sexual violence, Satanic summonings, and similar wholesome family bonding.
EP Flash: The Uncanny Valley
Published on 14 Aug 2006 at 2:46 am.
7 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
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-->By Jared Axelrod. (365 Tomorrows, The Voice of Free Planet X)
Read by Stephen Eley.
“I’m sorry,” Purby said, reshuffling the papers on his desk. “What was the problem with her?”
“Her breathing. She breathes. She doesn’t stop.”
“Yes, and?”
“It’s unnerving.”
Rated G. (Anything that isn’t G-rated in this story is entirely the product of your imagination.)
EP Flash: Stuck In An Elevator With Mandy Patinkin
Published on 3 Jul 2006 at 1:34 am.
14 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated PG.
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-->By Kitty Myers.
Read by Mur Lafferty (of Geek Fu Action Grip).
“Aren’t you Rube, the Grim Reaper in Dead Like Me?”
As he turned to look at me, an expression of amusement spread over his face like a wave of sunshine over a cloudy field. “I’m not a grim reaper in real life,” he mimicked, “but I do play one on TV!”
Rated PG. Contains references to drugs, claustrophobia, and canceled Showtime programming.
EP Flash: Paul Bunyan and the Photocopier
Published on 24 Jun 2006 at 4:06 am.
12 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
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-->By Larry Hammer.
Read by Michael R. Mennenga (of The Dragon Page).
Well, the time came Paul Bunyan had a pretty successful thing going with his lumber business. Fact is, the first year his company went public, the stock price doubled, and it went up fifty percent each of the three years after that. Mind you, this made Paul a target for corporate raiders. Why, the battle he had with Bluebeard is a yarn and a half–but that’s another tale. This is the story of what happened when Paul Bunyan’s secretary went on vacation.
Rated G. Objects in story may be larger than they appear.
EP Flash: Fools Seldom Differ
Published on 21 Feb 2006 at 2:27 am.
4 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
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-->By Jeff Noyle.
Read by William Hopkins (of SF Sourcebook).
The thing about the Ice is, you can get really, really, really bored. I spent a whole week here yesterday. So, you know that giant slanting floe with the scoop-up at the end that I sent a picture of? Carls and I said “oh cool, that would make a great ski-jump.” Only I was dumb enough actually to try it. About two minutes ago.
Rated G. Kids, don’t try this at home.
EP Flash: One Million Years B.F.E.
Published on 14 Feb 2006 at 2:51 am.
8 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
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-->By Merrie Haskell.
Read by Deborah Green.
Am determined to become strong, lithe, deadly, noble cave-woman type figure, √° la Ayla of Clan of the Cave Bear. I will fashion stone tools, hunt and gather food and live pristine, pure life of Homo Erectus-type person–at one with nature. Ah. Air is so fresh. Quite lovely.
Rated G. Contains ignoble savagery and predomestic strife.
EP Flash: The Team-Mate Reference Problem in Final-Stage Demon Confrontation
Published on 6 Feb 2006 at 2:12 am.
11 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
Read ‘EP Flash: The Team-Mate Reference Problem in Final-Stage Demon Confrontation’
-->By Constance Cooper.
Read by Frank Key (of Hooting Yard On The Air).
Colleagues, ours is a uniquely demanding profession. In no other job do you endanger your coworker’s soul if you call out to him in the course of your duties. But since a demon has power over you once it knows your name, well-meant warnings such as “Buck! Behind you!” can have tragic consequences.
Rated G. Important safety tip. (Thanks, Egon.)
EP Flash: Hibernation
Published on 24 Jan 2006 at 1:25 am.
10 Comments.
Filed under Flash, Podcasts, Rated G.
By Madge E. Miller.
Read by Stephen Eley.
Two Alaskan Kodiak bears joined a small circus where the pair appeared nightly in a parade, pulling a covered wagon. The fact that they had joined the circus was not so strange; the circus life was very popular even for the better class of bear. The strange thing was that they were both primitive mutes. This alone elevated or, in the opinion of some bears still angry about the Great Russian Dancing Bear Revolt of ‘06, lowered them to the level of freak show attraction.
Rated G. Contains non-graphic ursine violence.
